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Sports

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.
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Jim Thome Leaves Game Early With Tightness In Pants

BALTIMORE—Orioles designated hitter Jim Thome was forced to leave in the fourth inning of Sunday’s game against the Boston Red Sox after complaining about tightness in his pants. “Something just didn’t feel right and I could barely walk,” said Thome, who caused concern for teammates and coaches as he grimaced while gingerly ambling off the field. “It really pinched in the thighs and restricted movement in my legs. It even hurt to sit. I hope this doesn’t keep me out of the lineup for too long. The trainers tried to help me stretch out the fabric but it was still awfully stiff.” Thome, who has suffered from chronic trouseritis for much of his career, received good news Monday when the MRI revealed that the 42-year-old did not tear his pants.

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