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Dwight Howard Clearly Doesn’t Know Team’s Name

WASHINGTON—Noting his confused expression and uncertainty while shouting incorrect nicknames throughout the playoff game, sources confirmed Wednesday night that Atlanta Hawks center Dwight Howard clearly does not know his own team’s name.

Web Series Reaches 100 Views

A comedic webisode about two roommates became a viral sensation this week after reaching the unprecedented 100 view milestone.

Man Tries Using Pink 6-Pound Bowling Ball To Great Amusement

WEST ORANGE, NJ—Seemingly knowing full well that the relatively small and light ball was not designed for someone of his size, sources confirmed Tuesday that 25-year-old Darren Foerstner tried using a pink 6-pound bowling ball for one frame, all to the incredible amusement of friends and onlookers at Eagle Rock Lanes bowling alley.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.
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John Maine Takes Pitch Requests At Poorly Attended Mets-Nationals Game

NEW YORK—With Citi Field attendance during Sunday's matchup barely reaching 70 percent, Mets pitcher John Maine let fans who actually came to see the bottom two NL East teams play shout out pitch requests during Nationals at bats. "What's that? A slider? I haven't thrown that old classic in a while, but I'll give it a go," Maine said during the fourth inning. "All right, submarine pitch, then a palm ball. That's a weird one, but if you want to see me throw one of those, let's hear you scream!" Requests were no longer accepted after a teenage boy asked Maine to "throw something faster than 91 miles per hour," to which Maine responded, "Shut the hell up."

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