adBlockCheck

Sports

Dwight Howard Clearly Doesn’t Know Team’s Name

WASHINGTON—Noting his confused expression and uncertainty while shouting incorrect nicknames throughout the playoff game, sources confirmed Wednesday night that Atlanta Hawks center Dwight Howard clearly does not know his own team’s name.

Man Tries Using Pink 6-Pound Bowling Ball To Great Amusement

WEST ORANGE, NJ—Seemingly knowing full well that the relatively small and light ball was not designed for someone of his size, sources confirmed Tuesday that 25-year-old Darren Foerstner tried using a pink 6-pound bowling ball for one frame, all to the incredible amusement of friends and onlookers at Eagle Rock Lanes bowling alley.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.
End Of Section
  • More News

Josh Freeman Takes On Leadership Role To Help Vikings Find Franchise Quarterback

MINNEAPOLIS—Having just signed the former Buccaneers quarterback at the beginning of October, Vikings head coach Leslie Frazier told reporters Thursday that Josh Freeman has already stepped up as a prominent leader in the team’s search for a franchise quarterback. “Josh has really impressed us with his hard work scouting quarterbacks who could be the face of the franchise for the foreseeable future,” said Frazier, adding that the 25-year-old is always the first to arrive at the team’s practice facility every morning to interview overlooked free agents and often watches game tape of college prospects into the late hours of the night. “We don’t even have to tell him what to do—Josh just instinctively knows where to find all the stats on up-and-coming college quarterbacks around the country and takes it upon himself to identify guys who could potentially lead our offense. He already found a couple of very promising players whom we’re definitely going to pursue in this year’s draft.” An anonymous team source later told reporters that Freeman is also doing “an excellent job” helping the Vikings find a suitable new head coach.

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close