adBlockCheck

Sports

Who's Fucking: Zack and Evan

Coworkers Zack and Evan talk about moving past first impressions, stepping out of your comfort zone, and understanding what it really means to fuck someone.

Best Sports Documentaries

With ESPN’s film ‘OJ: Made In America’ emerging as an Oscars frontrunner this year, Onion Sports looks back at some of the greatest sports documentaries of all time.

Report: Look How Big Player Is Next To Sideline Reporter

GREEN BAY, WI—Marveling at the pronounced disparity in size during the postgame interview, sources confirmed Sunday that, Jesus Christ, just look at how big Houston Texans nose tackle Vince Wilfork is next to the CBS sideline reporter.

Best Sports Video Games Of All Time

With titles such as ‘FIFA 17’ and ’NBA 2K17’ expected to be popular gifts this holiday season, Onion Sports looks back on some of the best sports video games of all time.

Strongside/Weakside: Ezekiel Elliott

After becoming only the third player in NFL history to rush for 1,000 yards in his first nine games, Dallas Cowboys rookie running back Ezekiel Elliott is an early candidate for league MVP. Is he any good?

Strongside/Weakside: Theo Epstein

In just five seasons, Chicago Cubs president of baseball operations Theo Epstein assembled a team that is competing for the franchise’s first World Series title since 1908. Is he any good?

Jumbotron Really Trying To Push New Third-Down Cheer On Fans

SAN DIEGO—Noting that the phrase had appeared in large blue letters during each of the team’s offensive drives, sources at Qualcomm Stadium confirmed Friday that the Jumbotron was trying really hard to push a new third-down cheer on San Diego Chargers fans.

Strongside/Weakside: Kris Bryant

By leading the Chicago Cubs in hits and home runs en route to their second straight playoff appearance, Kris Bryant has placed himself in the running for the National League MVP. Is he any good?
End Of Section
  • More News

Juan Pierre's 72-Game Hitting Streak Lost Amid Recent Flurry Of Baseball Milestones

LOS ANGELES—In a weekend that saw Alex Rodriguez hit his 500th home run, Tom Glavine notch his 300th win, and Barry Bonds tie Hank Aaron's career mark of 755 homers, one small but notable accomplishment was overlooked: Dodgers centerfielder Juan Pierre collected a base hit in his 72nd consecutive game, quietly shattering the previous record of 56 games held by Joe DiMaggio. "Huh," ESPN analyst Buster Olney said of Pierre's consistent barrage of at least one hit per game for a span of nearly three months, dating all the way back to May 18 and raising Pierre's average from .265 to .423. "How do you like that?" Reporters were unable to contact Pierre before press time, as they are waiting to see if Bonds will hit No. 756 off Nationals starter Mike Bacsik, who is seeking his fourth consecutive perfect game.

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close