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How Movies Receive Their Ratings

Many Americans use the MPAA’s formalized rating system as a guide for which films to see. The Onion provides a step-by-step view into how these ratings are chosen:

‘Winnie-The-Pooh’ Turns 90

Winnie-The-Pooh, the A.A. Milne series featuring a stuffed bear and his toy animal friends, debuted 90 years ago this week. Here are some milestones from the franchise’s nearly century-long run:

50 Years Of ‘Star Trek’

Star Trek, the science-fiction show about the crew of the starship Enterprise, premiered 50 years ago today on NBC, spawning a cult following and decades of spin-offs. Here are some milestones from the franchise’s 50-year history

How Big-Budget Movies Flop

Despite the recent box-office failures of Exodus, Ben-Hur, and Gods Of Egypt, studios continue to fund big-budget movies they hope will achieve blockbuster success. The Onion provides a step-by-step breakdown of how one of these movies becomes a flop:

Your Horoscopes — Week Of August 30, 2016

ARIES: Sometimes in life, you just need to stop whatever it is you’re doing and take a step back. Actually, maybe it’s two steps back. Yeah, that’s good. Keep going. The stars will let you know when you’re far enough.

‘Rugrats’ Turns 25

This August marks the 25th anniversary of the premiere of Rugrats, the beloved Nickelodeon cartoon about intrepid baby Tommy Pickles and his group of toddler friends. Here are some milestones from the show’s nine-season run

Your Horoscopes — Week Of August 9, 2016

ARIES: Your life’s story will soon play out in front of movie theater audiences across the country, though it’ll only last about 30 seconds and advertise free soft drink refills in the main lobby.

Director Has Clear Vision Of How Studio Will Destroy Movie

LOS ANGELES—Saying he can already picture exactly what the finished cut will look like on the big screen, Hollywood film director Paul Stanton told reporters Wednesday he has a clear vision of how studio executives will totally destroy his upcoming movie.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of June 14, 2016

ARIES: Once the laughter dies down, the party favors are put away, and the monkeys led back inside their cages, you’ll finally be given a chance to explain your side of the story.

Lost Jack London Manuscript, ‘The Doggy,’ Found

RYE, NY—Workers inventorying the estate of a recently deceased Westchester County art dealer earlier this month reportedly stumbled upon a draft of a previously unknown Jack London novel titled The Doggy, and the work is already being hailed by many within the literary world as a masterpiece.

Guide To The Characters Of ‘The Force Awakens’

The highly anticipated seventh episode in the ‘Star Wars’ series, ‘The Force Awakens,’ which will be released December 18, will feature several returning characters as well as a host of new ones. Here is a guide to the characters of ‘Star Wars: The Force Awakens.’

Robert De Niro Stunned To Learn Of Man Who Can Quote ‘Goodfellas’

‘Bring Him To Me,’ Actor Demands

NEW YORK—Immediately halting production on his latest project after hearing of the incredible talent, legendary actor Robert De Niro was reportedly stunned to learn Wednesday that Bayonne, NJ resident Eric Sullivan, 33, can quote the critically acclaimed 1990 Martin Scorsese film Goodfellas at length.

Timeline Of The James Bond Series

This week marks the release of the 24th film in the James Bond franchise, Spectre, featuring Daniel Craig in his fourth appearance as the British secret agent. Here are some notable moments from the film series’s 53-year history
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Entertainment

Jude Law's First 100 Days As People Magazine's Sexiest Man Alive

HOLLYWOOD—All eyes are squarely fixed on Jude Law as he comes to the 100-day mark in his tenure as People magazine's Sexiest Man Alive 2004.

"You can't overstate the importance of the Sexiest Man Alive's first 100 days," said Veronica Giulletti, associate editor of People. "They set the tone for his entire term. The whole world is looking at him to see what is sexy."

In November, Law emerged as the new sexiest man alive, after a fiercely contested, sexy race that pitted him against such hunks as Orlando Bloom, Colin Farrell, and two-time winner Brad Pitt.

"Law's ascension was not a mandate, remember," Giulletti said. "The Sexiest Man Alive issue featured a complete list of heart-stoppers who ranged in age from 22 to 58. It included 34 actors, 10 singers, a baseball player, and a poker champ. If Law ever starts to rest on his laurels, he need only open his copy of the Nov. 17, 2004 issue. That photo spread is a stark, sexy reminder of the challenges the Sexiest Man Alive faces."

According to Giulletti, the Sexiest Man Alive receives the most media attention at the very beginning of his term. While some sexy men use the news coverage as an opportunity to introduce radical changes to their looks, Giulletti said that Law chose to stay the course.

"Jude came into office with a big, sexy plan in place," Giulletti said. "He'd spent years tweaking and refining his dapper image, so it was wise that he chose to stick with it."

Throughout his first 100 days, Law earned public-approval ratings ranging from the high 60s to the low 80s.

"While Jude's look is too conservative for some tastes, no one can deny that he conveys a strong, focused, well-honed sexiness," Giulletti said. "He has gorgeous cheekbones, sensual lips, and lovely blue eyes. His frame, while not Russell Crowe studly, certainly isn't too twee either."

Law signs autographs for the public.

Entertainment-industry pundits have lauded Law for his savvy campaign to distinguish himself from his predecessor, 2003's Sexiest Man Alive Johnny Depp.

"Johnny was sexy," entertainment writer Cami Stoeffer said. "That said, many People readers were disappointed by his administration. They felt the energy he expended overseas was in excess. Some took all that jet-setting as an indication that Johnny didn't care about making America a sexier place."

In contrast to Depp, Law introduced a "sexy by example" style of leadership, aggressively undertaking a highly publicized campaign advocating short-cropped hairstyles for men.

"Sexy-people-watchers advocate Jude's aggressive stance on haircuts," Stoeffer said. "It's a traditional platform, but Law has done well with his campaign to present a carefully styled, finished look. In fact, in a recent phone poll, 82 percent of women ages 18-34 agreed that Law is a total fox."

Nonetheless, critics are quick to point out Law's missteps.

Nelson Garcia, writer for the National Enquirer, said Law's first 100 days have been "a fiasco."

"From his overly gelled hair on the set of his forthcoming film All The King's Men to his hosting of Saturday Night Live on the night of Ashlee Simpson's lip-synching debacle, Jude Law has been an embarrassment to the entertainment world," Garcia said. "And let's not forget his visit to the Los Angeles Children's Hospital. It was a great chance to raise pulses nationwide by showing up in a well-worn sleeveless T-shirt and gym shoes. Instead, he looked like a dandy out on the court. Now, Matt Damon—there's a guy who could look good playing basketball with below-average-looking kids."

Mel Gibson, who was named People's first Sexiest Man Alive in 1985, urged the public to support Law.

"Jude has some challenges ahead of him, but I support him completely," Gibson said. "The Sexiest Man Alive is only human. It's not fair to attack him every time he looks tired or is seen in a club that isn't hip. Jude deserves a chance to show us what he's got—both in his riveting dramatic roles and in photos of him with his shirt off."

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