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Biggest Announcements From E3

Each June, E3, or The Electronic Entertainment Expo, hosts game developers showing off their latest products. Here are this year’s most exciting announcements:

‘Star Wars’ Turns 40

When George Lucas’ Star Wars premiered in 1977, the movie quickly became a phenomenon. On its 40th anniversary, The Onion looks back on the franchise’s defining moments:

Ringo Starr Announces 26th Beatles Album With New Backing Band

‘Moonbeam Sunday’ Slated For Release On June 16

LONDON—Excitedly informing fans that the iconic pop group was back with more original music, Ringo Starr announced Tuesday that on June 16 he would be releasing a 26th Beatles album titled ‘Moonbeam Sunday’ with an all-new backing band.
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Justin Bieber Recovering In Intensive Care Unit After Being Badly Booed

LAS VEGAS—Doctors at Valley Hospital Medical Center are reporting that pop sensation Justin Bieber is in critical but stable condition today after being admitted to the facility’s intensive care unit Sunday night with severe booing-related trauma sustained at the Billboard Music Awards. “Mr. Bieber was rushed into the ER late last evening after enduring heavy boos, and while the situation was pretty touch-and-go for a while there, his vitals look good and we are hopeful he will eventually make a full recovery,” emergency medical specialist Dr. Isaac Liss said of the 19-year-old singer, who entered the hospital after being badly hurt by a chorus of jeers, jibes, and heckles while accepting the fan-voted Milestone Award. “We’re just trying to administer lots of love and praise right now. He’s still on shaky ground, but with a steady, round-the-clock course of fawning adulation, I think Mr. Bieber will one day soon, with luck, be able to make another awards show appearance.” At press time, Bieber’s condition had taken a turn for the worse after the performer was booed by one of his nurses.

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