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‘Star Wars’ Turns 40

When George Lucas’ Star Wars premiered in 1977, the movie quickly became a phenomenon. On its 40th anniversary, The Onion looks back on the franchise’s defining moments:

Ringo Starr Announces 26th Beatles Album With New Backing Band

‘Moonbeam Sunday’ Slated For Release On June 16

LONDON—Excitedly informing fans that the iconic pop group was back with more original music, Ringo Starr announced Tuesday that on June 16 he would be releasing a 26th Beatles album titled ‘Moonbeam Sunday’ with an all-new backing band.
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Kevin Federline, Wife Divorce

Celebrities and personal drama took center stage before a gossip-hungry public this year, and perhaps none received more press than superstar rapper Kevin Federline. So when his wife of two years abruptly filed for divorce, the country took notice.

<p><b>K-FINISHED</b><br> Federline, whose immense success allowed him to buy expensive jewelry for his ex-wife.</p>

According to Federline's publicist, Marilyn Chang, the spouse, a 24-year-old entertainer who worked as a singer and foreground dancer at Federline performances before wedding him in 2004, presented Federline with divorce papers on Nov. 7 citing irreconcilable differences.

"K-Fed gave it his best, but in the end it just wasn't meant to be," said Chang of the reportedly tumultuous relationship between Federline and his partner, whose vocal talents have been featured on several pop and dance albums. "The good news is that this separation might afford Kevin the opportunity to finally move on and grow as an artist. This marriage was really slowing him down, and I think many will agree with me when I say we want the old Kevin back."

Federline is seeking sole custody of his two sons, claiming his estranged wife, a struggling actress who has appeared in soft-drink commercials, is unfit to care for 1-year-old Sean Preston and 3-month-old Jayden James.

"Kevin is a family man," Chang said. "He will do whatever is necessary to protect his kids, and he will not be undermined by this irresponsible hanger-on, who was only in the marriage to springboard her own career."

Federline has two children from a previous relationship with Shar Jackson, costar of the mid-90s UPN sitcom Moesha and a featured player in the 1997 Nickelodeon feature Good Burger.

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