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Kim Rhode

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360 Tour: Inside The RNC

The Onion invites you to explore our view from the floor of the 2016 Republican National Convention in Cleveland.

Good Guy With Gun, Bad Guy With Gun Both Excited To Unload Firearm In Crowd Outside Arena

CLEVELAND—As each of them looked around at the people gathered outside Quicken Loans Arena and fantasized about unholstering their weapon and taking aim directly at others, both a good guy with a gun and a bad guy with a gun attending the Republican National Convention reportedly worked themselves into a heightened state of excitement Thursday at the thought of unloading their firearm into the crowd.

Bob Dole Picked Off By Large Hawk Circling Arena Parking Lot

CLEVELAND—Describing how the bird of prey suddenly dived down from the sky at high velocity, sources confirmed Thursday that former GOP presidential nominee Bob Dole was picked off by a large red-tailed hawk circling above the Quicken Loans Arena parking lot.
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Kim Rhode

Shooting — El Monte, California

Shooting Style: Oh, you’ll find out

Reasons For Shooting Skeet: Self-defense; thinning of ever-rising skeet population

Bad Habits: Constantly scratching at crotch with shotgun

Motivation: Replacing her 1996 and 2004 gold medals, which have a ton of bullet holes in them by now

Favorite Gun Accessory: Other guns

Controversies: Doesn’t consume every part of skeet; stripped of gold medal in double trap after overwhelming evidence of a second shooter

NEXT: Lolo Jones

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