Kim Rhode

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Deadline For Prior User To Remove Clothes From Dryer Extended 5 Minutes

JOHNSON CITY, TN—Upon finding the machine in her apartment building’s laundry room completely untouched since she last stopped by, exasperated local woman Sandra Hermus reportedly mounted all her magnanimity Monday and extended the deadline for the previous user to remove their clothing from the dryer by five minutes.

Man Races Against Time To Take Out Trash Bag With Widening Puncture

RIO RANCHO, NM—His pace steadily quickening as he rounded the corner out of his kitchen and made a beeline for the front door, local man Henry Parnasse reportedly found himself locked in a race against time Wednesday morning to take out a trash bag with a widening hole in its side.

Tips For Traveling With Young Children

Family vacations can be a time for bonding and building lasting memories, but when young children are involved, trips can also be stressful to plan and execute. Here are The Onion’s tips for traveling with kids
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Kim Rhode

Shooting — El Monte, California

Shooting Style: Oh, you’ll find out

Reasons For Shooting Skeet: Self-defense; thinning of ever-rising skeet population

Bad Habits: Constantly scratching at crotch with shotgun

Motivation: Replacing her 1996 and 2004 gold medals, which have a ton of bullet holes in them by now

Favorite Gun Accessory: Other guns

Controversies: Doesn’t consume every part of skeet; stripped of gold medal in double trap after overwhelming evidence of a second shooter

NEXT: Lolo Jones