adBlockCheck

Law Enforcement Officials Call For Creation Of Bulletproof Sleeves

Top Headlines

Recent News

Fact-Checking The First Presidential Debate

Addressing issues ranging from national security to trade to their personal controversies, Democratic nominee Hillary Clinton and Republican nominee Donald Trump squared off in the first presidential debate Monday. The Onion takes a look at the validity of their bolder claims:

Viewers Impressed By How Male Trump Looked During Debate

HEMPSTEAD, NY—Saying the Republican nominee exhibited just the qualities they were looking for in the country’s next leader, viewers throughout the nation reported Monday night that they were impressed by how male Donald Trump appeared throughout the first debate.

Poll: 89% Of Debate Viewers Tuning In Solely To See Whether Roof Collapses

HEMPSTEAD, NY—Explaining that the American people showed relatively little interest in learning more about the nominees’ economic, counterterrorism, or immigration policies, a new Quinnipiac University poll revealed that 89 percent of viewers were tuning into Monday night’s presidential debate solely to see whether the roof collapses on the two candidates.

New Study Finds Solving Every Single Personal Problem Reduces Anxiety

SEATTLE—Explaining that participants left the clinical trial feeling calmer and more positive, a study published Monday by psychologists at the University of Washington has determined that people can significantly reduce their anxiety by solving every single one of their personal problems.

Trump Planning To Throw Lie About Immigrant Crime Rate Out There Early In Debate To Gauge How Much He Can Get Away With

HEMPSTEAD, NY—Saying he would probably introduce the falsehood in his opening statement or perhaps during his response to the night’s first question, Republican nominee Donald Trump reported Monday he was planning to throw out a blatant lie about the level of crime committed by immigrants early in the first presidential debate to gauge how much he’d be allowed to get away with.

Rest Of Nation To Penn State: ‘Something Is Very Wrong With All Of You’

WASHINGTON—Stating they felt deeply unnerved by the community’s unwavering and impassioned defense of a football program and administration that enabled child sexual abuse over the course of several decades, the rest of the country informed Penn State University Friday that there is clearly something very wrong with all of them.

Strongside/Weakside: Lamar Jackson

After passing for eight touchdowns and rushing for another 10 in just the first three weeks of the season, Louisville Cardinals sophomore quarterback Lamar Jackson has quickly become the frontrunner to win the Heisman Trophy. Is he any good?
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

Law Enforcement Officials Call For Creation Of Bulletproof Sleeves

DETROIT—Citing decades of advancements in torso protection, the National Association of Law Enforcement Officials held a press conference Monday, calling for the development of a bulletproof sleeve.

A computer representation of the theoretical sleeves.

"Since 1975, the modern Kevlar bulletproof vest has been an integral part of the protective gear worn by police officers," said NALEO spokesman Sgt. Nicholas Arons, an 18-year veteran of the Detroit Police Department. "For some reason, however, both private- and public-sector forces have spent the past 30 years focusing their creative energies on the development of newer, lighter fabrics to protect the same limited portion of the upper body. While safeguarding the torso is extremely important, it's time we began to think about what might be done to protect some other body parts."

According to Arons, two key areas overlooked by the protection industry are the left and right arms.

"We believe a bulletproof sleeve, if properly designed, could protect the shoulder, upper arm, elbow, and lower arm regions," said Arons, who lost both his forearms in a narcotics raid in October. "An officer wearing one of these devices on each arm would find himself doubly protected."

Arons characterized the arms as "crucial" to the successful completion of a police officer's duties.

"Police officers use their arms hundreds of times every day," Arons said. "If they didn't have arms, officers would be unable to brandish or discharge firearms, handcuff perpetrators, operate doors, write speeding tickets, or file reports. A policeman's arms and attached appendages are essential."

NALEO advisory board member Lt. Lee Skille agreed, stating that the standard-issue upper-body protection armor has significant shortcomings.

Two NYPD officers patrol attempt to protect their arms through means other than bulletproof sleeves.

"People say, 'You can live without your arms, but you can't live without your chest,'" said Skille, whose partner's arm was shot in the line of duty in 2003. "True. But try not using your arms for a day, and then come and tell me how arms aren't a 'vital organ.'"

Skille said he does not know how a bulletproof sleeve would be anchored onto the body, but that "in a perfect world, the sleeve would attach to the vest."

In response to the announcement, representatives for domestic defense contractor FirstShield said they plan to develop a marketable bulletproof sleeve by the end of the year. The company's 2004 prototype ArmVest failed in initial testing, because of complaints that the two 34-inch-wide ArmVests impeded movement and were prone to falling off. FirstShield is now investigating the practicality of using snaps, zippers, and Velcro to anchor the vest to the body.

FirstShield CEO Alastair Gilbert pledged "to redouble efforts to design a product that meets the arm-protection needs of today's 21st-century police force."

"While we might not get there in our first hundred days, or even our first thousand, we have risen to this challenge," Gilbert said. "Anyone who puts in 25 years with a police force deserves to have a wrist to put his gold watch on."

While the law-enforcement community is largely united over the bulletproof-sleeves initiative, the announcement did have a few detractors.

"Maybe the NALEO nancy-boys have never taken a bullet in the rear end," said Gary, IN police officer Bernard Dirkson, who was shot twice in the buttocks during a routine traffic stop in 2002. "But it's no stroll on the beach, I assure you. I challenge the defensive-apparel industry to take the next major step in protective gear: Protect our hindquarters."

Arons said the NALEO plans to look beyond the upper body.

"By the end of the century, a police officer might be equipped with some form of protection for his legs," Arons said. "Of course, right now we're focused on achieving our first goal—guarding the arms."

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close