adBlockCheck

Lawrence The T-1 Connection Guy Hit Of White-Collar Comedy Tour

Top Headlines

Entertainment

Director Has Clear Vision Of How Studio Will Destroy Movie

LOS ANGELES—Saying he can already picture exactly what the finished cut will look like on the big screen, Hollywood film director Paul Stanton told reporters Wednesday he has a clear vision of how studio executives will totally destroy his upcoming movie.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of June 14, 2016

ARIES: Once the laughter dies down, the party favors are put away, and the monkeys led back inside their cages, you’ll finally be given a chance to explain your side of the story.

Hollywood Stars Overthrown In Bloody C-List Uprising

LOS ANGELES—Unleashing a brutal wave of violence and destruction that has upended the entire power structure of the entertainment industry overnight, the nation’s C-list celebrities have carried out a bloody coup to overthrow the hottest stars in Hollywood, sources reported Tuesday.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

Lawrence The T-1 Connection Guy Hit Of White-Collar Comedy Tour

OFFICE PARK, MD—This year's White Collar Comedy Tour, the comic festival that "dots all the I's while it crosses the business class," is selling out nationwide largely due to the moderately edgy office comedy of "Lawrence The T-1 Connection Guy"—"the thinking man's Dilbert." "I don't care what your level of diversity training is, company policy requires you to file that under 'Humorous,'" Lawrence often quips after one of his many uproarious bits about improper middle-manager–secretarial-assistant relations. "Now, let's 'commit to increased productivity'!" Lawrence, born Emerson Huckins in Miami, OH, is currently working on his first book, tentatively titled You Don't Have To Use This Seven-Step Organizational System Of Effective But Mildly Irreverant Cheese-Movers To Work Here—But It Helps!

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close