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Level-Headed Yankee Fans To Take Curtis Granderson's Excellent Season Into Account Should He Struggle Down Stretch

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Kevin Durant Wins Gold In Men’s Individual Basketball

RIO DE JANEIRO—Beating out Serbian Nikola Jokic by .87 points in order to claim the all-around title, U.S. forward Kevin Durant won Olympic gold Friday in men’s individual basketball, becoming the first man to win consecutive golds in the competition since Gary Payton at the 1996 and 2000 Games.

Michael Phelps Spots Estranged Father Poseidon In Stands

RIO DE JANEIRO—Immediately recognizing the booming, thunderous voice he hadn’t heard since he was 5 years old as he warmed up ahead of his first heat in the 200-meter individual medley, U.S. Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps reportedly spotted his long-estranged father, Poseidon, God of the Sea, cheering for him Thursday in the stands of the Olympic Aquatics Stadium.
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Level-Headed Yankee Fans To Take Curtis Granderson's Excellent Season Into Account Should He Struggle Down Stretch

NEW YORK—The New York Yankees fanbase, known for its level headed and reasonable disposition, released a collective statement Monday claiming that, should MVP candidate Curtis Granderson begin to slump come September, they would carefully take into consideration his excellent season before determining exactly how they should treat him. “He’s had a career year for us, so if he goes a couple games without a hit or strikes out during a clutch situation in the bottom of the 8th inning, we won’t abruptly turn on him by booing him or questioning his sexual orientation,” said Yankees fan John Pompa, adding that fans of the pinstripes are practical people who understand that every baseball player goes through a slump. “It’s our responsibility to realize, especially in situations where Curtis’ play may hurt our record, that he was a major component in making us a World Series contender in the first place. So we’re not going to fly off the handle and shout things at him that either degrade his family or could be construed as racially insensitive.” While Yankees fans stated they would be pleasantly surprised if the team could win its 28th World Series this year, they admitted that winning isn’t everything.

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