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Listen, Area Boss Gets It

PHILADELPHIA—Readily admitting that everything you’re saying makes a lot of sense, Greenwave Media accounts manager Bryan Mellis confirmed on Wednesday that he totally gets it.

Man Hoping Game Gets Out Of Hand So He Can Do Something Else

DENVER—Settling into his apartment’s cramped living room to watch the midday game, local man Garrett Neubauer told reporters Wednesday that he hoped the televised baseball game between the Colorado Rockies and the San Francisco Giants would get out of hand soon so he could do something else.
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Listener Consumed By Spittle On Corner Of Mouth

DOWNERS GROVE, IL—The words of area resident Pete Fargas were lost Saturday on listener Lois Dumas, who was rendered unable to concentrate due to a gob of spittle on the left corner of Fargas' mouth. "He kept talking, and I kept nodding, but I really couldn't focus on anything but the spittle," Dumas said. "I was just hoping he would eventually sense its presence and clear it away with his tongue, but he never did."

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