Local Applebee's Removes Photo Of Underperforming Pop Warner Team

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Local Applebee's Removes Photo Of Underperforming Pop Warner Team

BOISE, ID—Taking the group portrait down from the eatery’s wall, local Applebee’s manager Gus Piedmont announced Friday that the restaurant was rescinding their sponsorship of the Panthers Pop Warner football team, claiming that the “pathetic” 0-3 start was not up to the establishment’s standards. “They’re not cutting it anymore, so they’re gone,” said Piedmont, adding that the group of 8-year-old football players was “just stinking up the field.” “It’d be one thing if they just lost, but they got killed by Bates Auto Repair. We don’t want those failures inside this restaurant. We’re sorry, but Applebee’s can’t be associated with a bunch of duds.” Panthers coach Mitch Goodman said that losing Applebee’s was “no big deal,” acknowledging that he had made inroads with the local Dairy Queen, an establishment his team reportedly prefers to patronize after games anyway.

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