Local Father Briefs Family On Which Basketball Players Now Household Names

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According to new research, the cartoon “spokescharacters” on cereal boxes are purposefully drawn with their stares angled downward to make eye contact with young children, which researchers say raises the trust level between kids and the carto...

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OAKLAND, CA—Upon realizing that opponents always seem to have better facilities, equipment, and players, team sources confirmed Friday that Oakland A’s outfielder Coco Crisp approached manager Bob Melvin and quietly asked whether their team wa...

Date Invites Woman Upstairs To Check Out Red Flags

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Local Father Briefs Family On Which Basketball Players Now Household Names

EDINA, MN—Gathering his wife and children Monday to bring them up to date, local man George Litton, 57, reportedly apprised his family of which basketball players are currently household names. “Here’s the rundown: Kobe Bryant, as you know, is a household name, as are Dwyane Wade, LeBron James, and, as of more recently, Kevin Durant,” said Litton, who went on to list several more players before emphasizing that Cavaliers point guard Kyrie Irving had not yet accomplished enough to be considered a household name. “I know you may think Steph Curry is a household name, but he’s not. Not yet. He’s carved out a place for himself as the Warriors’ best player and as a premier NBA point guard, but he’s not a household name. Now, is Paul George a household name? Fair question. Earlier this season, I might have said yes, but given the Pacers’ struggles over the last month, it’s less certain. Until further notice, Paul George is not a household name.” Litton added that should anyone have questions regarding the list of household names, he is always willing to answer them anytime, day or night.

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