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‘Star Wars’ Turns 40

When George Lucas’ Star Wars premiered in 1977, the movie quickly became a phenomenon. On its 40th anniversary, The Onion looks back on the franchise’s defining moments:

Ringo Starr Announces 26th Beatles Album With New Backing Band

‘Moonbeam Sunday’ Slated For Release On June 16

LONDON—Excitedly informing fans that the iconic pop group was back with more original music, Ringo Starr announced Tuesday that on June 16 he would be releasing a 26th Beatles album titled ‘Moonbeam Sunday’ with an all-new backing band.
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Lost Jack London Manuscript, ‘The Doggy,’ Found

RYE, NY—Workers inventorying the estate of a recently deceased Westchester County art dealer earlier this month reportedly stumbled upon a draft of a previously unknown Jack London novel titled The Doggy, and the work is already being hailed by many within the literary world as a masterpiece. “The Doggy is a gripping tale of a playful 3-year-old yellow Labrador retriever in the Yukon and shows London, the master of vivid naturalist prose, at the height of his literary powers,” said Columbia University professor Andrew Spellman of the longhand manuscript that is believed to have been penned in 1908 and chronicles the everyday life of a dog named Cody as he gnaws on fur-lined boots, scampers after tennis balls, and gives big, wet, sloppy kisses. “Indeed, one cannot read The Doggy without feeling the author’s intensity for the subject, from the untamed ferocity of Cody’s howls when he hears the doorbell ring, to the raw yearning seen in the doggy’s eyes when he wants his big old tummy rubbed.” According to Spellman, this is the most significant discovery in American literature since a copy of Robert Frost’s unpublished poem “Brrrrrr, It’s Cold” turned up in 2003.

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