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What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.

Brad Pitt Sidelined 6 To 8 Weeks With Red Carpet Toe

LOS ANGELES—Saying doctors strongly recommended that he stay off the injured foot, representatives for Brad Pitt confirmed to reporters Sunday that the actor was sidelined six to eight weeks with a case of red carpet toe.

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:
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Low-Budget Film Panders Just As Shamelessly As Big Studio Feature

NEW YORK—Moviegoers were reportedly impressed this weekend by the ability of an independent feature produced on an $80,000 budget to be just as shamelessly pandering as any blockbuster from a major studio. "Wow. Between its cloying indie soundtrack, quirky animated title sequence, and tangential subplot ending in a failed suicide attempt, I felt every bit as patronized as I did watching Transformers 3," viewer Samantha Holmes, 26, said of the latest release from IFC Films, which stars Kat Dennings and, in a few key scenes in which emotional truths are revealed, Paul Dano. "Maybe even more so, since at least Transformers 3 wasn't pretending to be something it's not." Audience members confirmed the movie ends on a bittersweet note before credits roll to the whistling of a catchy melody accompanied by ukulele.

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