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Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.

Keys To The Matchup: Packers vs. Falcons

The NFC Championship Game pits the Atlanta Falcons against the Green Bay Packers for the rare chance to play a meaningful game in Houston. Onion Sports breaks down what each team must do to win.
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Mackey Sasser: 'Hey Everybody, Look At Me, I Took Steroids—I'm Mackey Sasser And I Took Steroids'

NEW YORK—Former Mets catcher Mackey Sasser called an impromptu press conference last night to inform the public that he, too, has taken steroids. "Hey everyone, over here, it's me, Mackey Sasser. Remember me? The big fat catcher from the late '80s and early '90s Mets teams? Mackey Sasser. Not Dave Magadan, not Howard Johnson, not Kevin McReynolds—Mackey Sasser. Well, just wanted to let you all know that, believe it or not, I, of all people—me, Mackey Sasser!—took steroids. Yessiree bob, you heard it right, I took steroids. Whaddaya know? Bet you never suspected me. Not in a million years. Mackey Sasser, taking steroids," Sasser said. "I didn't take amphetamines, I didn't take human growth hormone, nope—I took the real thing. Steroids. Took 'em every day. Just thought you should know. Okay, bye." Sasser then told reporters that he would be "standing right over here" if they had any further questions.

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Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

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