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Revelations From Hillary Clinton’s New Memoir

‘What Happened,’ a new memoir detailing the trials and tribulations of Hillary Clinton’s 2016 campaign, was released today, with Clinton supporters and detractors already divided on its contents. Here are some of Hillary’s bombshell revelations:

Joe Arpaio’s Family Surprises Him With Detained Hispanic Motorist

FOUNTAIN HILLS, AZ—In celebration of the dismissal of his conviction for criminal contempt via presidential pardon, Joe Arpaio’s family reportedly sought to surprise the former sheriff Tuesday with a 30-year-old Mexican national whom they detained on suspicion of having entered the country illegally.
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Mafia Breaks Off Diplomatic Relations With CIA

WASHINGTON, DC—The Mafia announced Monday that after more than 50 years of close relations, the powerful crime organization is breaking off ties with the CIA. "Our partnership with the CIA has been extremely productive over the years, resulting in many great accomplishments, including the Kennedy and Martin Luther King assassinations, the creation of Las Vegas, and the near-overthrow of the Castro regime," Mafia official Joseph "Joey" Tucci said. "Unfortunately, that partnership is no longer effective." Tucci denied any Mafia involvement in the 1991 cancellation of The Days and Nights of Molly Dodd.

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Revelations From Hillary Clinton’s New Memoir

‘What Happened,’ a new memoir detailing the trials and tribulations of Hillary Clinton’s 2016 campaign, was released today, with Clinton supporters and detractors already divided on its contents. Here are some of Hillary’s bombshell revelations:

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