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Listen, Area Boss Gets It

PHILADELPHIA—Readily admitting that everything you’re saying makes a lot of sense, Greenwave Media accounts manager Bryan Mellis confirmed on Wednesday that he totally gets it.

Man Hoping Game Gets Out Of Hand So He Can Do Something Else

DENVER—Settling into his apartment’s cramped living room to watch the midday game, local man Garrett Neubauer told reporters Wednesday that he hoped the televised baseball game between the Colorado Rockies and the San Francisco Giants would get out of hand soon so he could do something else.
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Man Can Get By In His Own Language

TEMPE, AZ—American citizen Ray Ayers can get along pretty well in his native language of English when he has to, the 57-year-old said Friday night after friends commented on his ability to order a meal at a restaurant. "I'm not exactly fluent, but I know enough to get by," said Ayers, adding that he's learned to read facial expressions whenever he's in English-speaking regions, such as the part of Arizona where he lives. "And you can use hand gestures to get drinks, ask about the bathroom, say hello, goodbye, thank you, how much for this. People usually figure out what you mean." Ayers admitted that he rarely uses anything but the present tense and, except for road signs and some menu items, does not recognize a word of the written language.

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