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Best Sports Video Games Of All Time

With titles such as ‘FIFA 17’ and ’NBA 2K17’ expected to be popular gifts this holiday season, Onion Sports looks back on some of the best sports video games of all time.

Can Trump Follow Through On His Campaign Promises?

President-elect Donald Trump made a variety of lofty promises during his campaign as part of a pledge to “make America great again.” The Onion looks at several of these promises and evaluates whether Trump will be willing or able to follow through on them.

Being A Mom Was The Best Four Years Of My Life!

As I get older, I find myself reflecting on my life more often and marveling at what an amazing journey it’s been. I’ve made tons of great friends, been to magnificent places all over the world, and learned so many important things about myself along the way. But if I’m being honest, there’s one period of my life that stands out from all the rest: those four incredible years when I was a mom.
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Man Just Having One Of Those Decades Where He Doesn't Feel Like Doing Anything

LANSING, MI—Saying he just hasn’t been motivated to change out of his pajamas and put on nice clothes, 45-year-old Jeff Renton confirmed Tuesday that he’s currently having one of those decades where he doesn’t really feel like getting up and doing anything. “It’s already 2014 and I haven’t really gotten around to anything yet, so at this point, I’m probably just going to chill out on the couch for the rest of the decade and see what’s on Netflix,” said Renton, who reportedly awoke on New Year’s Day 2010 feeling “kind of blah” and then, after not getting much done over the next 36 months, decided to call the current decade a wash. “Some decades you feel motivated to do stuff and some you just feel like playing video games and staying in bed. And seeing how this decade’s gone so far, I might as well just take it easy for the next six years and focus on picking things up again in the 2020s.” Renton noted, however, that if he found himself inspired, he might consider showering and taking a stab at some light housework around 2018.

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