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National Zoo Announces Giant Pandas To Divorce

WASHINGTON—Assuring the public that the decision was difficult but the right thing to do for all parties involved, the Smithsonian National Zoological Park announced Friday that their giant pandas would be divorcing.

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

Pros And Cons Of Electric Cars

With technology improving and more automobile companies releasing electric models, electric cars are becoming a common alternative for American consumers. Here are the pros and cons of electric vehicles.
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Man Not Sure Why Girlfriend Having Him Hang Cluster Of Empty Picture Frames But Willing To Go With It

ANN ARBOR, MI—After receiving the mystifying task of hanging an array of nine empty picture frames of various sizes on the couple’s living room wall Thursday, local man Jake Montalvo reportedly admitted that while he wasn’t sure where his girlfriend, Celeste Ladd, was headed with this idea, he was at least willing to go along with it. “Is this kind of what you were thinking?” asked the man tentatively while positioning the frames in a straight line, prompting laughter and a swift correction from Ladd as he struggled to comprehend her puzzling vision. “Oh, like, all together in a bunch? With the little red one down there? Uh, okay, I guess.” At press time, Ladd directed Montalvo’s attention to an old, weathered tin box, which he deduced was either garbage she wanted him to throw away or a central decorative element in some master plan that he was still straining to unravel.

More from this section

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

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