Man Sneaks In Mid-Snack Nibble

In This Section

Vol 48 Issue 27

Giraffes Of The Kalahari

Discovery 8:00 p.m. EDT/7:00 p.m. CDT With the help of photography and narration, viewers will get a little smarter in the giraffe department.

Dana Alvarez and Ryan Coffman

Dana Alvarez and Ryan Coffman tied the knot Saturday night at Beef ‘O’ Brady’s just to get that drunken Unification Church officiate off their goddamn backs.

The Rookie

ABC 9:00 p.m. EDT/8:00 p.m. CDT In tonight's season-four finale, everyone agrees that while, yes, Detective Sergeant is in his fourth year and should no longer be considered a rookie on the force, they will continue to consider him a rookie, because the ...

Obama Slips 'Hope' Into Speech For The Fans

A string of poorly received performances forces a sock puppet to return to a foot, a study shows that 85% of Americans don't know all of the dance moves to the national anthem, and Keith Richards' housekeeper has braced herself for finding a dead body eve...
End Of Section
  • More News
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Good Times

Man Considers Nodding Approvingly After Friend’s Drink Purchase

MEQUON, WI—Seeking to convey his endorsement of his acquaintance's selection at local bar Coney's Draft House this evening, area man Thomas Dodge told reporters that he was considering nodding approvingly at his friend’s alcoholic beverage pur...

Pop Culture

Man Commits To New TV Show Just Hours After Getting Out Of 7-Season Series

UNION CITY, NJ—Recommending that he give himself the chance to pause and explore the other options out there, friends of local man Jonathan Gember expressed their concerns to reporters Wednesday that the 29-year-old is already committing to a new television show just hours after getting out of a seven-season-long series.

Man Sneaks In Mid-Snack Nibble

CEDAR RAPIDS, IA—Local man Gary Crawford reportedly sneaked in a quick mid-snack nibble Thursday, devouring an Oreo cookie to pacify an intense craving the 46-year-old experienced while munching from a box of Cheez-It crackers. "I started feeling hungry between chews and had a hankering for something sweet, so I figured slipping an Oreo in there might just hit the spot," Crawford said. "It definitely helped tide me over until the next handful of Cheez-Its." Crawford confirmed that after finishing the crackers he enjoyed a post-snack pork-out by gnawing on a summer sausage.

Next Story

Onion Video

Watch More