Man Who Willingly Rented 'Wrath Of The Titans' Feels His Intelligence Has Been Insulted

In This Section

Vol 49 Issue 04

North Korea To Test New Nuclear Weapon

In response to recently imposed U.N. sanctions, North Korea vowed to conduct its third test of a nuclear weapon, warning of confrontation with its proclaimed “arch-enemy” the United States.

Study Exposes Risks Of Conducting Research While Driving

NASA continues its search for a planet capable of supporting NASA, Prince Harry announces that he killed some Taliban-looking people during his tour of duty, and a copy of 'The Scarlet Letter'' can't believe the notes a high schooler is writing in its mar...
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Spring

Pop Culture

Man Commits To New TV Show Just Hours After Getting Out Of 7-Season Series

UNION CITY, NJ—Recommending that he give himself the chance to pause and explore the other options out there, friends of local man Jonathan Gember expressed their concerns to reporters Wednesday that the 29-year-old is already committing to a new television show just hours after getting out of a seven-season-long series.

Man Who Willingly Rented 'Wrath Of The Titans' Feels His Intelligence Has Been Insulted

PORTLAND, OR—After willfully ignoring thousands of other options, reading a synopsis of the film’s plot, and making a conscious decision to pay $3.99 to rent it on iTunes, 32-year-old Ben Rickman announced Friday that the makers of Wrath Of The Titans had inflicted a grave insult upon his intelligence. “Do they think I’m some kind of idiot?” said Rickman, who confirmed that he had seen the movie’s trailer and read numerous dismissive reviews of it. “I guess the studio figured there’d be plenty of morons out there who’d cough up the dough to see this garbage. Unbelievable.” Rickman added that he has plans to swing by Taco Bell later to eat a 7-Layer Burrito, an item he will reportedly dismiss as “greasy” and “something that barely qualifies as food” before ordering a second one.

Next Story

Onion Video

Watch More