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What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.

Brad Pitt Sidelined 6 To 8 Weeks With Red Carpet Toe

LOS ANGELES—Saying doctors strongly recommended that he stay off the injured foot, representatives for Brad Pitt confirmed to reporters Sunday that the actor was sidelined six to eight weeks with a case of red carpet toe.

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:
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Man Who Willingly Rented 'Wrath Of The Titans' Feels His Intelligence Has Been Insulted

PORTLAND, OR—After willfully ignoring thousands of other options, reading a synopsis of the film’s plot, and making a conscious decision to pay $3.99 to rent it on iTunes, 32-year-old Ben Rickman announced Friday that the makers of Wrath Of The Titans had inflicted a grave insult upon his intelligence. “Do they think I’m some kind of idiot?” said Rickman, who confirmed that he had seen the movie’s trailer and read numerous dismissive reviews of it. “I guess the studio figured there’d be plenty of morons out there who’d cough up the dough to see this garbage. Unbelievable.” Rickman added that he has plans to swing by Taco Bell later to eat a 7-Layer Burrito, an item he will reportedly dismiss as “greasy” and “something that barely qualifies as food” before ordering a second one.

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