adBlockCheck

Recent News

Earth Ranked Number One Party Planet

FRAMINGHAM, MA—Noting its high concentration of nightlife, droves of attractive singles, and atmospheric conditions allowing liquid alcohol to exist, the ‘Princeton Review’ on Monday ranked Earth the Milky Way galaxy’s top party planet for the fifth year in a row.

Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.
End Of Section
  • More News

Man Wishes Computer Could Do Thing It Already Can Do

RICHMOND, VA—Though confirming he is mostly satisfied with his newly acquired Mac desktop, local man Peter Selwyn said Wednesday he is disappointed that it is unable to do something that in fact every modern computer, including his own, is already capable of doing. “I wish there were some way it could just take a picture of my work on the screen and allow me to save it for future reference,” said the 36-year-old, describing the screenshot feature that has been standard on most home computers since the mid-1980s. “I can’t be the only person who would find a function like that useful, right? Hopefully they think to include it in future models.” At press time, Selwyn had reportedly found a way to work around the problem by using a smartphone to photograph his computer screen and then printing out the image for his records.

More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close