Mariners Fire Whiffing Coach

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Vol 44 Issue 24

Area Grandmother Tries Indian Food

BLOOMINGTON, MN—Witnesses report Eileen Rutherford, 78, was overwhelmed by the unusual aromas but appeared delighted when a recognizable pea rolled out of her samosa.

Cricket Located

IRWIN, PA—In a feat of extraordinary patience, auditory precision, and monklike concentration, 42-year-old Pat Baer interrupted his favorite TV...

CD Sales Down, LP Sales Up

While sales of CDs fell 17 percent between 2006 and 2007, sales of LPs rose 36 percent in the same period. What do you think?
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Mariners Fire Whiffing Coach

SEATTLE—Claiming that Mariners whiffers have not been swinging wildly or embarrassingly enough, GM Bill Bavasi fired team whiffing coach Jeff Pentland Monday. "Our guys have simply forgotten the basics—flailing, guessing, just standing there like a statue as a perfect pitch comes sailing right over the plate," Bavasi said. "Sure, we've excelled in areas such as hitting soft fly balls directly to the left-fielder and grounding weakly into double plays, but that only gets you so far. We need to get to a point where our team is able to whiff with the game on the line." Bavasi, however, once again reserved heavy praise for the team's sucking coach.
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