adBlockCheck

Sports

Best Sports Documentaries

With ESPN’s film ‘OJ: Made In America’ emerging as an Oscars frontrunner this year, Onion Sports looks back at some of the greatest sports documentaries of all time.

Report: Look How Big Player Is Next To Sideline Reporter

GREEN BAY, WI—Marveling at the pronounced disparity in size during the postgame interview, sources confirmed Sunday that, Jesus Christ, just look at how big Houston Texans nose tackle Vince Wilfork is next to the CBS sideline reporter.

Best Sports Video Games Of All Time

With titles such as ‘FIFA 17’ and ’NBA 2K17’ expected to be popular gifts this holiday season, Onion Sports looks back on some of the best sports video games of all time.

Strongside/Weakside: Ezekiel Elliott

After becoming only the third player in NFL history to rush for 1,000 yards in his first nine games, Dallas Cowboys rookie running back Ezekiel Elliott is an early candidate for league MVP. Is he any good?

Strongside/Weakside: Theo Epstein

In just five seasons, Chicago Cubs president of baseball operations Theo Epstein assembled a team that is competing for the franchise’s first World Series title since 1908. Is he any good?

Jumbotron Really Trying To Push New Third-Down Cheer On Fans

SAN DIEGO—Noting that the phrase had appeared in large blue letters during each of the team’s offensive drives, sources at Qualcomm Stadium confirmed Friday that the Jumbotron was trying really hard to push a new third-down cheer on San Diego Chargers fans.

Strongside/Weakside: Kris Bryant

By leading the Chicago Cubs in hits and home runs en route to their second straight playoff appearance, Kris Bryant has placed himself in the running for the National League MVP. Is he any good?
End Of Section
  • More News

Mario Chalmers Under Impression Heat Need Him To Step Up In Playoffs

MIAMI—Heading into the team’s first-round matchup against the Milwaukee Bucks, sources confirmed Friday that Miami Heat point guard Mario Chalmers has somehow fallen under the impression that his teammates really need him to step it up during the playoffs. “They can’t do it without me, so I definitely have to bring my A-game,” said Chalmers, adding that head coach Erik Spoelstra is counting on him to be at his absolute best on defense and maintain flawless perimeter shooting amid the team’s bid for a second consecutive NBA title. “This is the playoffs, so I can’t afford to have an off game. Everyone’s depending on me out there, and if I don’t make my presence felt, we could be headed home early.” Chalmers also confirmed that he will need to be a vocal leader on the floor in order to set an example for Dwyane Wade, Ray Allen, and LeBron James.

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close