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McCain Blasts Obama As Out Of Touch In Burma-Shave-Style Billboard Campaign

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Trump Casually Informs Pence He Going To Make One Or Two Appearances During Speech

CLEVELAND—Pulling his running mate aside backstage at the Republican National Convention just minutes before the Indiana governor was scheduled to formally accept the party’s vice presidential nomination, GOP candidate Donald Trump casually informed Mike Pence that he would probably make one or two quick appearances during the Midwestern conservative’s headlining speech tonight.

‘Heed My Tragic Story Well, Friends, For You Could Just As Easily Be Me,’ Says Chris Christie In Haunting RNC Speech

CLEVELAND—A thrall sweeping over the assembled GOP officials and party members Tuesday as he recounted his chilling tale of hubris, New Jersey governor Chris Christie reportedly entreated those at the Republican National Convention to consider the sad story of his own dizzying rise and ignominious fall, offering a bitter warning to all in attendance that his terrible fate could befall any one of them.
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McCain Blasts Obama As Out Of Touch In Burma-Shave-Style Billboard Campaign

RAPID CITY, SD—John McCain escalated his attacks on Obama's leadership credentials Tuesday by endorsing a series of rhyming Burma-Shave-style billboards that accuse the Democratic presidential candidate of being out of touch with the current political landscape. "Barack Is Sipping/Fine Champagne/While U.S. Jobs/Go Down The Drain/ McCain '08," read the five consecutive 2-by-5-foot bright red wooden signs erected along a 1.5-mile stretch of South Dakota highway, emulating an advertising medium first popularized by the Burma-Vita Company in 1926 to sell brushless shaving cream. As a follow-up to the scathing roadside polemic, McCain announced plans to lampoon Obama's foreign policy inexperience in a short skit alongside comedian Bert Wheeler and the vivacious Dorothy Lee, to be seen on the late-night variety program Cavalcade Of Stars on the DuMont Television Network.

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