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Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.
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Memphis Grizzlies Ask For Two Weeks Off To Practice

MEMPHIS, TN—In order to improve their 3-10 record, the last-place Memphis Grizzlies requested permission from NBA officials yesterday to take two weeks off so that they may practice their ball-handling skills, lay-ups, and passing. "Our inbound plays need a lot of work, and the majority of my guys don't know where they're going in our zone press," said head coach Mike Fratello, adding that the extra time will allow him to go over film for their December 16 game against the Miami Heat. "We also need to get on the same page in terms of knowing what the difference is between our 'Motion 1' and 'Motion 2' offense." According to Fratello, if his request is granted, the first thing he will do is gather his players at half court and show them what a triple-threat position is.

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