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Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.

Keys To The Matchup: Packers vs. Falcons

The NFC Championship Game pits the Atlanta Falcons against the Green Bay Packers for the rare chance to play a meaningful game in Houston. Onion Sports breaks down what each team must do to win.
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Mets Retaliate For David Wright Beaning By Murdering Pablo Sandoval

NEW YORK—After a 94-mph beaning last weekend landed Mets star David Wright on the 15-day disabled list, his teammates retaliated Monday by ruthlessly stabbing San Francisco Giants third baseman Pablo Sandoval to death. "Hey, it's just part of the game," blood-soaked pitcher Mike Pelfrey said at an evening press conference. "If your pitcher is going to hit one of our guys, we're going to react. And we'll do that by cornering one of your guys in a dark parking lot at night, slamming his head into a car door, thrusting knives repeatedly into his chest and stomach, and leaving him there to bleed in silence until he's found dead the next morning. That's baseball." As of press time, both teams had been warned by home plate umpire Phil Cuzzi.

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Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

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