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Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.
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Mets To Play Brewers In One-Game Choke-Off

MILWAUKEE—With both teams collapsing neck and neck, Major League Baseball announced Tuesday that the Mets and Brewers will play a one-game choke-off to determine which team will spiral into playoff elimination. "The 2008 Brewers have proven that they can choke with the best of them, but the Mets have the choking experience," Baseball Tonight analyst John Kruk said. "It really all depends on which team decides to step up and wilt under pressure. Either way, this one should be truly painful to watch." Experts are predicting that the Mets and Brewers will both somehow find a way to lose.

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