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Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.

Keys To The Matchup: Packers vs. Falcons

The NFC Championship Game pits the Atlanta Falcons against the Green Bay Packers for the rare chance to play a meaningful game in Houston. Onion Sports breaks down what each team must do to win.
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Miami Dolphins Wonder If They'll Have End Zones In England

MIAMI—While preparing for their upcoming game in London against the New York Giants, the struggling Miami Dolphins spent most of the week's practices trying to answer questions concerning differences in the football itself, whether the gaps in a British line were numbered backwards, and whether or not England has end zones. "All right…I know when you cross the Atlantic that the strong side is the weak side and weak side is the strong side, so you drive down the opposite side of the field," said Dolphins quarterback Cleo Lemon, who confessed he was concerned about the team's two-minute drill since he was not sure of the length of the British minute. "But, if I'm right-handed, I don't have to throw with my left, do I? And how do we get first downs since they don't have yards over there? I knew I should have watched NFL Europe when it was still on." Lemon added that he was worried that the ball would spiral in the opposite direction in England, although the coaches had reassured him he was thinking of Australia.

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Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

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