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Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.
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Michael Vick Not Sure He's Got Another 4-12 Season In Him

PHILADELPHIA—Newly re-signed Eagles quarterback Michael Vick, 32, revealed in a candid interview Thursday that he’s not confident he has another 4-12 season left in him. “If you’re asking me to be totally honest, I’m not sure lightning can strike twice and I’ll be able to perform like I did last season again,” said Vick, adding that given his age and the particular situation in Philadelphia, most players would feel fortunate to reach two wins. “Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m going to play my hardest in hopes of reaching six or seven wins, but after being in the league for as long as I have, you begin to realize what’s possible and what’s not.” In the wake of Vick’s comments, second-year backup quarterback Nick Foles said that if the situation arises, he’s more than ready to step in for any number of hard-fought losses.

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