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Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.
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Mike D'Antoni Excited To Finally Have Chance To Coach Lakers

LOS ANGELES—Heading into the final game of the NBA’s regular season, Lakers coach Mike D’Antoni told reporters Wednesday that he is thrilled to finally have the opportunity to actually coach the Los Angeles Lakers. “We have the right personnel in place now to allow me to install my system of offense, and I honestly couldn’t be happier with the roster at the moment,” said D’Antoni, adding that he’s been waiting a long time to be in charge of the Lakers basketball team and couldn’t be more excited to finally get started. “I know it’s late in the season, but I’m just happy that I can do what I was actually brought here to do.” Reached for comment, Lakers GM Mitch Kupchak revealed that D’Antoni will have approximately nine months before the team reevaluates his position as head coach.

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