WOODBURY, MN—Noting how the pair’s failure to promptly resolve the situation was a clear indication of their inability to raise or care for another human being, sources confirmed Friday that the parents of a crying infant must not be any good.
ORANJESTAD, ARUBAIn a surprise election result, Aruban voters elected missing Alabama teen Natalee Holloway to their parliament Tuesday. "The people of Aruba know that Miss Holloway has been through hell and, possibly, back, and that means a lot to us," said Fredis Oduber, who cast his ballot for Holloway along with 87 percent of his countrymen. "Our congratulations and prayers are with her family at this time." The incumbent in Holloway's seat is expected to serve until MP-elect Holloway takes office or her body is found.