Missy Franklin

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‘SportsCenter’ Co-Anchors Clearly Dating

BRISTOL, CT—Saying that the pair could barely take their eyes off one another throughout the hour-long sports news program, ESPN viewers told reporters Friday that it is increasingly clear SportsCenter anchors John Anderson and Matt Barrie are currently dating.

Terrifying Uniformed Bachelorette Party Storms Local Bar

TACOMA, WA—Bursting into the establishment seemingly out of nowhere and overtaking it within a matter of moments, a terrifying uniformed bachelorette party stormed local pub Casey’s Saloon Friday night, onlookers reported.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Missy Franklin

Swimming — Centennial, Colorado

Favorite Musical Artist: Who cares? Really, who the fuck cares?

Accomplishment: Once swam to bottom of pool and touched grate

Special Skills: Excellent breath control during post-race interview

Biggest Inspiration: Her coach, who bends over pool at every meet, yelling, “Swim! Swim! Swim a lot! Keep swimming!”

Weaknesses: Still has to hold nose underwater like little baby

NEXT: Kim Rhode

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