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What To Watch For In The New Obi-Wan Kenobi Film

Disney has announced they are in the early stages of developing a stand-alone ‘Star Wars’ film focused on the adventures of Jedi master Obi-Wan Kenobi. Here’s what fans can expect to see in the upcoming release.

Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

MT. VERNON, OH—Loudly explaining to anyone within earshot that both the left and right were ruining the level of discourse in this country, Jesse Levin, a man firmly in the center of the political spectrum, is under the impression that he is less obnoxious than those with more partisan viewpoints, sources reported Friday.
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More Americans Putting Off Marriage Until Ultimatum

HYATTSVILLE, MD—Noting a generational shift in the way couples choose to build their lives together, the National Center for Health Statistics confirmed this week that a growing number of Americans are delaying marriage until one partner backs the other into a corner and issues an ultimatum. “In the past, a marriage proposal was usually the result of a few months of indirect pressure, but increasingly we’re finding that what convinces a person to tie the knot is a non-negotiable threat to end a years-long relationship,” said NCHS director Charles Rothwell, stating that more individuals are waiting until their partner breaks down in tears and says something along the lines of “I just can’t do this anymore” before asking for their hand in marriage. “Today, the decision to spend your life with someone is frequently made under duress, triggered by the recognition that you will lose this person forever if you don’t say yes to the all-or-nothing choice you have been presented with.” Rothwell added that more often than not, the ultimatums are issued by someone who has just found out yet another close friend from college is getting married.

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Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

MT. VERNON, OH—Loudly explaining to anyone within earshot that both the left and right were ruining the level of discourse in this country, Jesse Levin, a man firmly in the center of the political spectrum, is under the impression that he is less obnoxious than those with more partisan viewpoints, sources reported Friday.

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