adBlockCheck

More And More Athletes Getting Ice Water Injected Into Veins

Top Headlines

Sports

Report: Gonzaga’s In Washington, Right?

NEW YORK—Ahead of the team’s first-round game against Seton Hall in the NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament, a new report released Thursday revealed that Gonzaga is in Washington state, right?

Teary-Eyed Robert Griffin III Slips On Draft Day Suit Again

WASHINGTON—With several tears streaming down his face as he stood alone in his bedroom’s walk-in closet, sources confirmed Wednesday that former Washington Redskins quarterback Robert Griffin III slipped on the suit he wore to the 2012 NFL Draft.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

More And More Athletes Getting Ice Water Injected Into Veins

DURHAM, NC—The number of athletes attempting to achieve increased composure and improved performance in clutch situations by injecting ice water into their veins has risen every year for the past decade, researchers said on Monday. "Contrary to popular belief, ice water only runs naturally through the veins of a very small number of athletes," said Dr. Doug Reynolds of the Duke Sports Medicine Center, citing Tiger Woods and Kobe Bryant as benchmark examples of natural ice-water retainers. "Keep in mind that while ice water provides the body with necessary hydration, and is a completely legal substance, there's also a good chance these injections could send the body into an acute state of circulatory shock." Researchers also found that the frequency of subcutaneous Gatorade injections in top athletes has gone down since those commercials aren't on as much as they used to be.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close