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Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Nation Leery Of Very Odd Little Boy

WASHINGTON—Noting that there was something distinctly unnerving about his mannerisms, physical appearance, and overall demeanor, the nation confirmed Friday that it was leery of very odd 8-year-old Brendan Nault.

What You Need To Know About The Trump Administration’s Ties To Russia

New revelations from the U.S. intelligence community about potentially illegal communications between members of the Trump administration and Russian officials, which led to Michael Flynn resigning as national security advisor Monday, have increased calls for a wider investigation of Trump’s murky ties to Russia. Here’s what you need to know.

A Timeline Of Valentine’s Day History

Every February, people across the world engage in romantic traditions with their loved ones in celebration of Valentine’s Day. The Onion provides a timeline of the holiday’s inception and evolution:
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Mother Knows Perfect Picture To Publicize If Daughter Ever Abducted

GLENCOE, IL—Concerned mother Eva Germaine, 42, has already picked out the perfect picture to release to the media should her daughter Brittney, 16, ever be abducted by a maniac, sources close to the family reported Monday. "I went back and forth on it for a while, but now I'm convinced this one with her holding the soccer ball and smiling would be just right—it has this overall wholesomeness to it that's working really well," said Germaine, stressing how important it would be publicize a "friendly, likable" image of her daughter in the event of a missing-and-possibly-raped scenario. "I'll just tuck this away for when the time comes." Sources confirmed Germaine was planning to run the picture by her daughter first before finalizing the selection.

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Nation Leery Of Very Odd Little Boy

WASHINGTON—Noting that there was something distinctly unnerving about his mannerisms, physical appearance, and overall demeanor, the nation confirmed Friday that it was leery of very odd 8-year-old Brendan Nault.

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