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Sports

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.
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Nation Excited For Opportunity To Watch Harbaugh Lose Super Bowl

WASHINGTON—Football fans across the nation were reportedly exhilarated this week, claiming that they were thrilled for the much-anticipated opportunity to finally see a Harbaugh lose a Super Bowl. “I’m so pumped up! I can’t wait to savor every moment of a Harbaugh losing an NFL Championship,” said Kansas City resident Eric Rasmussen, adding that he’s praying for Super Bowl XLVII to be an embarrassing blowout. “It’s going to be awesome watching that special moment when a Harbaugh dejectedly walks off the field instead of hoisting up the Lombardi Trophy.” While the country’s football fans admitted seeing a Harbaugh lose the AFC Championship and NFC Championship last year was something “very special,” most confirmed that “this will be way better.”

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