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What To Watch For In The New Obi-Wan Kenobi Film

Disney has announced they are in the early stages of developing a stand-alone ‘Star Wars’ film focused on the adventures of Jedi master Obi-Wan Kenobi. Here’s what fans can expect to see in the upcoming release.

Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

MT. VERNON, OH—Loudly explaining to anyone within earshot that both the left and right were ruining the level of discourse in this country, Jesse Levin, a man firmly in the center of the political spectrum, is under the impression that he is less obnoxious than those with more partisan viewpoints, sources reported Friday.
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Nation Mostly Alarmed That Government’s Top Programs Handled By 29-Year-Olds

WASHINGTON—Following reports Sunday that the source of the leaked National Security Agency surveillance practices is 29-year-old government contractor Edward Snowden, polls revealed today that beyond concerns about privacy, Americans are primarily distressed that sensitive government programs are apparently being managed by kids who were still in high school when 9/11 happened. “Sure, this raises troubling questions about liberty and security, but what’s really bothering me here is that there are people in very high positions handling national security matters of grave importance who are the same age as my son,” Virginia resident Karen Linder said of the Gen-Y whistleblower. “He’s had, what, six years of experience? Let’s get some older guys in there. How about someone in his 40s who’s lived a little bit, who’s maybe old enough to have voted in more than two elections.” Linder went on to add that she was, however, impressed that the millennial had a job.

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