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Nation Wrestling With Notion Of Mark Cuban Winning NBA Title

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Kevin Durant Wins Gold In Men’s Individual Basketball

RIO DE JANEIRO—Beating out Serbian Nikola Jokic by .87 points in order to claim the all-around title, U.S. forward Kevin Durant won Olympic gold Friday in men’s individual basketball, becoming the first man to win consecutive golds in the competition since Gary Payton at the 1996 and 2000 Games.

Michael Phelps Spots Estranged Father Poseidon In Stands

RIO DE JANEIRO—Immediately recognizing the booming, thunderous voice he hadn’t heard since he was 5 years old as he warmed up ahead of his first heat in the 200-meter individual medley, U.S. Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps reportedly spotted his long-estranged father, Poseidon, God of the Sea, cheering for him Thursday in the stands of the Olympic Aquatics Stadium.
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Nation Wrestling With Notion Of Mark Cuban Winning NBA Title

DALLAS—Within hours of the Mavericks sweeping the Lakers Sunday to advance to the NBA Western Conference Finals, basketball fans across the United States began preparing themselves for the very real possibility of outspoken libertarian and tech billionaire Mark Cuban winning an NBA championship. “Yeah, I know, first thought that occurred to me was ‘Oh, man, that would be terrible,’” said Eugene, OR water-treatment plant worker Tracy Williams, adding that his jaw clenched uncomfortably at the idea of Cuban kissing the championship trophy with his “big, loud, stupid mouth.” "But then I thought, you know what? The guy clearly loves his team. He treats his players great. Maybe he does deserve an NBA title. Then I got pissed off at myself for thinking that.” At press time, reporters are currently weighing the pros and cons of asking Mark Cuban to comment.

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