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Best Sports Video Games Of All Time

With titles such as ‘FIFA 17’ and ’NBA 2K17’ expected to be popular gifts this holiday season, Onion Sports looks back on some of the best sports video games of all time.

Strongside/Weakside: Ezekiel Elliott

After becoming only the third player in NFL history to rush for 1,000 yards in his first nine games, Dallas Cowboys rookie running back Ezekiel Elliott is an early candidate for league MVP. Is he any good?

Strongside/Weakside: Theo Epstein

In just five seasons, Chicago Cubs president of baseball operations Theo Epstein assembled a team that is competing for the franchise’s first World Series title since 1908. Is he any good?

Jumbotron Really Trying To Push New Third-Down Cheer On Fans

SAN DIEGO—Noting that the phrase had appeared in large blue letters during each of the team’s offensive drives, sources at Qualcomm Stadium confirmed Friday that the Jumbotron was trying really hard to push a new third-down cheer on San Diego Chargers fans.

Strongside/Weakside: Kris Bryant

By leading the Chicago Cubs in hits and home runs en route to their second straight playoff appearance, Kris Bryant has placed himself in the running for the National League MVP. Is he any good?

Rest Of Nation To Penn State: ‘Something Is Very Wrong With All Of You’

WASHINGTON—Stating they felt deeply unnerved by the community’s unwavering and impassioned defense of a football program and administration that enabled child sexual abuse over the course of several decades, the rest of the country informed Penn State University Friday that there is clearly something very wrong with all of them.

Strongside/Weakside: Lamar Jackson

After passing for eight touchdowns and rushing for another 10 in just the first three weeks of the season, Louisville Cardinals sophomore quarterback Lamar Jackson has quickly become the frontrunner to win the Heisman Trophy. Is he any good?

Strongside/Weakside: Carson Wentz

After being selected second overall in the 2016 NFL Draft, Philadelphia Eagles quarterback Carson Wentz opened the season with a nearly flawless performance in a victory over the Cleveland Browns. Is he any good?
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National Champion LSU Retires At The Top Of Its Game

NEW ORLEANS—Mere moments after hoisting the crystal national championship trophy, Tigers coach Les Miles announced that LSU had made the decision to "go out on top" and retire after almost 150 years as a public university.

"Believe me, beating the Ohio State Buckeyes was tough, but coming to this decision was much tougher," said Miles, who said he reached the decision after a Christmas day meeting with LSU chancellor John O'Keefe, university president John Lombardi, and Tigers quarterback Matt Flynn. "But I really feel that after winning our second national chamionship in five years, Louisiana State University and Agricultural and Mechanical College has nothing left to prove—to others or to ourselves."

"There's not a doubt in my mind that this university will be as successful at whatever it chooses to do in its private life as it was playing football," Miles added. "The lessons LSU learned in becoming national champions will go with us for the rest of our lives, no matter where life takes us."

Though established in 1859, Louisiana State University did not play football for more than 30 years, finally giving the game a try in 1893. Even then, success was long in coming, and the school did not win a national championship until 1958.

"We don't have the advantages of a lot of other institutions of higher learning, but I'd put our love for football up there with any of them," Chancellor O'Keefe said Tuesday. "But I believe every college, university, what have you, has to be honest with itself and realize there's a time to bow out gracefully. And LSU's time is now."

"I'm overjoyed about the championship, and I've enjoyed being a part of what makes this university so great," said Flynn, who was 19 of 26 for 174 yards and four touchdowns in what turned out to be his school's final public appearance. "That's what makes this decision so bittersweet, for me and for all the other players, coaches, students, professors, advisers, administrators, everybody. But when you're done, you're done."

Flynn, like most of LSU's 34.000 students, intends to spend a week or so enjoying the victory and celebrating the championship before moving out of his soon-to-be-demolished dormitory and pursuing work in the private sector.

"There were so many good times and so much great football with so many wonderful people that I have no regrets," said LSU architecture professor Marsha Cuddeback. "Sure, I'll miss teaching here. But there's not a doubt in my mind this is the right thing to do."

"You get to a point where there's just nothing else to accomplish," President Lombardi told reporters Tuesday, in between completing the paperwork that would cancel the spring semester and arranging for the sale of LSU's 2,100-acre campus. "From here on out, we at the university would just be padding our career stats. That's not how we want to be remembered."

"When people think of LSU, we want them to think of a class act," Lombardi said. "We want them to say, 'There's a school that really knew when it was time to walk away.'"

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