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Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.
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Nation's Women Thank Sports Illustrated For Helping Them Make Well-Informed Swimsuit Choices

NEW YORK—Weeks after their 2008 swimsuit issue hit newsstands, Sports Illustrated continues to be deluged with mail from appreciative women across America thanking the magazine for once again helping them choose attractive, functional beachwear. "It's never too early in the spring to get your wardrobe ready for summer!" Cleveland, OH housewife Erica Robbins, 46, wrote in a letter the magazine received Monday. "I've already made an appointment with a local artist to airbrush a dramatically high-cut crimson 'tankini' on my naked body the first day the thermometer goes over 75!" Although the special issue is extremely popular with women, Sports Illustrated's annual swimwear shopping guide continues to elicit thousands of subscription cancellation demands every year from the magazine's overwhelmingly male readership.

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