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Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.

Manager Can’t Remember Why He Came Out To Mound

HOUSTON—Visibly irritated with himself as he paced around the pitcher’s plate after calling for time during the fourth inning of their game against the Washington Nationals, Houston Astros manager A.J. Hinch could not remember why he came out to the mound in the first place, sources confirmed Thursday.
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NCAA Lacrosse National Championship Goes Off Without A Hitch

BALTIMORE—The NCAA men's Division I collegiate lacrosse championship was successfully contested as expected Monday, crowning the season's winning team as easy as you please. "Both schools got there on time with all their lacrosse equipment, the field was fine, and there were the required number of refs. So we played the game," University of Virginia captain Bray Malphrus said the night after completing the match. "When it was over, the winning team was handed a trophy, pictures were taken, we changed out of our uniforms, and everybody went back to their hotels." Though the NCAA head office and officials directly involved said they were content the game had gone off without a hitch, all admitted it really would not have been a big deal if there had been some problems.

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