adBlockCheck

Entertainment

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of January 31, 2017

Aries: They say there’s nothing quite like the bond between a mother and her child, but then they have yet to see your experimental new adhesive compound. Taurus: The stars, in their infinite wisdom, recommend that you check yourself this week, as not doing so might lead you to wreck yourself in the future.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of January 24, 2017

Aquarius No offense, but when got into this business, dealing with empty and meaningless futures like yours sure as hell wasn’t what it had in mind. Pisces Though you’ve been told that dressing up once in a while wouldn’t kill you, the coroner’s report this week will contain evidence to the contrary.

How Movies Receive Their Ratings

Many Americans use the MPAA’s formalized rating system as a guide for which films to see. The Onion provides a step-by-step view into how these ratings are chosen:
End Of Section
  • More News

‘NCIS’ To Cease Print Edition

NEW YORK—Longtime readers are already mourning the end of an era as CBS announced today that at the end of this month it would cease print operations of the popular drama NCIS after several years of diminishing ad revenue and subscription rates. “While we have always endeavored to publish the finest and most hard-hitting NCIS print content possible, our business model unfortunately can no longer support physical, hard-copy editions of the Naval Criminal Investigation Service’s adventures,” said NCIS publisher Shane Brennan, a long-time employee who delivered hard copies of the naval police procedural by truck during its infancy. “While I still think that the print edition is the best way to experience NCIS—turning each page, feeling the newsprint on your fingers—it's time for us to move on and accept that the industry is changing. Still, I know I’ll always enjoy taking one of the hardbound print anthologies of past seasons off the shelf and leafing through classic exploits from yesteryear of Gibbs, McGee, and the rest of the team.” The NCIS editorial board later confirmed that they would continue to release new content on the drama’s weekly television edition.

More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

More from this section

Your Horoscopes — Week Of January 24, 2017

Aquarius No offense, but when got into this business, dealing with empty and meaningless futures like yours sure as hell wasn’t what it had in mind. Pisces Though you’ve been told that dressing up once in a while wouldn’t kill you, the coroner’s report this week will contain evidence to the contrary.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close