adBlockCheck

International

The Life Of Diana, Princess Of Wales

Today marks 20 years since the funeral of Princess Diana, known to many as the “people’s princess.” The Onion looks back at the life of Princess Diana before it was cut tragically short.

Study: Other Countries Weird

BOSTON—Examining a wide variety of cross-cultural data, a Boston University study released Monday determined that other countries are weird.

Japanese Family Puts Aging Robot In Retirement Home

KYOTO, JAPAN—Saying the move to the assisted care facility was the right decision after so many years of operation, members of the Akiyama family finally put their aging robot in a retirement home, sources reported Friday.

North Korea Successfully Detonates Nuclear Scientist

PYONGYANG—Hailing it as a significant step forward for their ballistic weapons program just hours after suffering a failed missile launch, North Korean leaders announced Monday they had successfully detonated a nuclear scientist.
End Of Section
  • More News

Nelson Mandela Celebrates 94th Birthday In Prison After Violating Parole

ROBBEN ISLAND—Following reports he crossed international borders without first calling his parole officer, former South African president Nelson Mandela celebrated his 94th birthday yesterday in a Robben Island prison cell. "It's unfortunate when this sort of thing happens, especially since Nelson's usually so good about the weekly phone calls, drug tests, and not associating with other ex-cons," said Mandela's longtime parole officer, Ted Jackson, who claimed that despite successfully holding down a job as an international dignitary for the past 22 years, the former president is still "held to the same standards as all former inmates." "He's been warned before. Hopefully, this will teach him to call me next time he plans to leave for another overseas conference on international poverty." Mandela previously violated his parole in 1993, after failing to make a court appearance while he was receiving his Nobel Peace Prize.

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close