adBlockCheck

Nervous Joe Girardi Blows Interview With Yankees

Top Headlines

Sports

Social Media Rock Star Makes $28,000 Per Year

Widely regarded as one of the online world’s brightest personalities, sources confirmed Friday that famed 28-year-old social media rock star Ryan Wasserman, better known as @RWthinks by his legions of passionate fans, makes roughly $28,000 per year.

How The IOC Plans To Address Doping

In light of its recent decision not to bar Russian athletes from competing in Rio despite their use of performance-enhancing drugs, the International Olympic Committee is working to establish more effective protocols to keep the Games drug-free. Here are some ways the IOC plans to address doping:
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

Nervous Joe Girardi Blows Interview With Yankees

TAMPA, FL—Former manager of the year Joe Girardi blamed "rustiness and an extreme case of nerves" after blowing his interview for the New York Yankees head coaching position yesterday. "It started to go bad when I forgot my resume at home, got worse when I called Steinbrenner 'Mr. Steensbaum,' and it went straight downhill from there," said a flustered Girardi, who also blanked on the names of Yankee legends Babe Ruth and Joe DiMaggio, told his potential boss that in five years he saw the Yankees being a .500 baseball team, and called Johnny Damon the next Mickey Mantle during the hour-long interview with Hank Steinbrenner and general manager Brian Cashman. "Then, in order to say something that would set me apart from other candidates, I told Mr. Steinbrenner that if I got the job I would move Mariano Rivera to the starting rotation. That didn't go over so hot." When Steinbrenner asked Girardi who he thought should be the manager of the Yankees, Girardi named Joe Torre, saying that he couldn't think of anyone else who deserves the position more, knew the team as well, or would do anywhere near as good a job.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close