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Pros And Cons Of The Gig Economy

Americans are increasingly using on-demand services, both as workers and consumers. Here are the major benefits and drawbacks of the gig economy.

Frontier Airlines Tells Customers To Just Fucking Deal With It

‘You’re Uncomfortable For A Few Hours And Then You Get To Be Somewhere Else,’ Says CEO

DENVER—Noting that some discomfort should be expected while traveling to a faraway place in just a few goddamn hours, officials from ultra-low-cost carrier Frontier Airlines reportedly told customers Thursday to just fucking deal with it.

Top Family Vacation Spots

With school out for the summer, families are packing up and hitting the road. Here are The Onion’s top family vacation destinations.
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New Biodiversity Program Busses In Species From Outside Ecosystems

WASHINGTON—As part of an effort to provide equal opportunities across habitats and enrich the lives of wildlife throughout the nation, officials from the EPA unveiled a new biodiversity program Friday that will bus in species from different ecosystems. “We are firmly committed to creating a diverse biosphere by fostering relationships between flora and fauna with unique experiences and perspectives,” agency spokesman Adam Wilson said of the federally funded program, which launched this week by shuttling two dozen species of plants and animals from the Everglades to the northern Great Plains. “Before these exchanges, many fir trees in the Colorado Rockies, for example, might go their entire lives without ever meeting a clam. But soon, they’ll be able to live together in harmony and gain a new understanding of their different backgrounds and biomes.” At press time, sources confirmed that a charter bus filled with javelinas and saguaro cacti had been stopped by protesters at the Arkansas border demanding they go back to the desert.

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Frontier Airlines Tells Customers To Just Fucking Deal With It

‘You’re Uncomfortable For A Few Hours And Then You Get To Be Somewhere Else,’ Says CEO

DENVER—Noting that some discomfort should be expected while traveling to a faraway place in just a few goddamn hours, officials from ultra-low-cost carrier Frontier Airlines reportedly told customers Thursday to just fucking deal with it.

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