adBlockCheck

Entertainment

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of January 31, 2017

Aries: They say there’s nothing quite like the bond between a mother and her child, but then they have yet to see your experimental new adhesive compound. Taurus: The stars, in their infinite wisdom, recommend that you check yourself this week, as not doing so might lead you to wreck yourself in the future.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of January 24, 2017

Aquarius No offense, but when got into this business, dealing with empty and meaningless futures like yours sure as hell wasn’t what it had in mind. Pisces Though you’ve been told that dressing up once in a while wouldn’t kill you, the coroner’s report this week will contain evidence to the contrary.
End Of Section
  • More News

New Fox Sitcom Outrageous

LOS ANGELES—According to television industry insiders, a new Fox sitcom scheduled to debut Nov. 17 is outrageous.

The new program, Sweet Georgia Washington, stars rapper Sandy "Pepa" Denton (of Salt-n-Pepa fame) as Georgia Washington, a wise-cracking, back-sassing White House maid who interferes with political affairs each week, stirring up major trouble for the President (Howard Hesseman).

"When you see this new show," said longtime television executive Myron Bell, "I think you will understand why it is being called 'the outrageous new comedy from the creators of Martin.'"

As a recent Fox commercial for Sweet Georgia Washington announced, "This Sunday night, the federal government is about to get hit... below the beltway."

According to Morton Zollner, Fox senior vice-president of marketing, the key to the new sitcom is its no-holds-barred uproariousness. "You won't believe some of the things that Georgia does," Zollner said. "For example, in the first episode, an old friend from high school comes to visit, and to impress her, Georgia gets the prime minister of Israel to pretend to be her boyfriend."

"I won't give away the end," Zollner said, "but let's just say it's outrageous."

Sweet Georgia Washington airs Sundays at 8 p.m., right after Cuttin' the Phat!, starring Sinbad as the director of an inner-city weight-loss camp.

More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

More from this section

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of January 31, 2017

Aries: They say there’s nothing quite like the bond between a mother and her child, but then they have yet to see your experimental new adhesive compound. Taurus: The stars, in their infinite wisdom, recommend that you check yourself this week, as not doing so might lead you to wreck yourself in the future.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close
settings