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Politics

Biden Opts Out Of Putting Last Few Felonies On Job Application

WASHINGTON—Saying he would be “sitting pretty” if he landed such a primo gig, Vice President Joe Biden reportedly decided Tuesday to leave off several of his most recent felonies while filling out a job application for a blackjack dealer position at the Horseshoe Casino Baltimore.

Departing Bo Obama Lands K Street Lobbyist Position

WASHINGTON—Touting his lengthy tenure in the White House and close personal relationships with the president of the United States and first lady, executives at Brownstein Hyatt Farber Schreck announced Monday that once the current administration steps down later this week, the departing Bo Obama will officially join their high-powered K Street lobbying firm.

A Timeline Of Trump’s Relationship With The Press

President-elect Donald Trump routinely insists that he is treated unfairly by the press, while many in the news industry have openly expressed how difficult it can be to report on him in today’s chaotic media environment. Here is a timeline of the major events that have shaped this relationship.

The Pros And Cons Of Universal Basic Income

As Finland tests a program to give a universal basic income to unemployed citizens, many wonder if a similar initiative could work in the United States. Here are some pros and cons of such a program:

What Compromising Information Does Russia Have On Donald Trump?

On Tuesday, it was reported that leaders of American intelligence agencies had given Donald Trump a memo advising that Russia had gathered compromising personal information about him as part of a wider effort to disrupt the election, though these claims remain unsubstantiated and both the president-elect and the Kremlin deny these reports. Here’s a look at what damaging information Russia may have in its possession.

How Confirmation Hearings Work

On Tuesday, Congress began holding confirmation hearings to evaluate the fitness of President-elect Donald Trump’s cabinet nominees for their offices. Here is a step-by-step guide to the confirmation hearing process.
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New Hampshire Primary Excites Tiny Percentage Of Population Who Even Cares What Happens Anymore

CONCORD, NH—Today's New Hampshire primary, considered crucial to determining 2012's Republican presidential nominee, has excited the tiny percentage of Americans who even give a damn what happens anymore, political analysts told reporters. "What's happening here is absolutely electrifying to the few people still capable of clinging to a shred of trust in any public institution remaining in the United States," said pundit Marcus Brennan, describing the meager segment of the U.S. populace that has yet to be beaten into apathy by two wars, a terrible economy, daily life, and a highly dysfunctional federal government. "Of the citizens glued to their television sets this evening, perhaps as many as .005 percent of them will be awaiting the results with bated breath. It's a great day for America." Tonight's results are expected to impact the upcoming South Carolina primary, which is highly anticipated by the estimated dozen or so Americans who will be remotely conscious of a single fucking thing that's going on by then.

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